Practice makes perfect

The 5 Steps seem to be obvious to some of us. It just seems like common sense. But if you are following the 5Steps or doing this consciously for the first few times, it may be slow going.

The hardest is knowing when to start. We are often too caught up in our daily routines. Problems disrupt those routines. We get upset and feel angry or worse lash out. We forget to stop and take a deep breath. And do the first step, admit that you have a problem and the second step, describe the problem. If you are facing a problem, do this now. Please stop reading, find a trusted friend, admit your problem and describe it to them. If you don't want to share it now,say it to out loud to yourself. It works best when you actually say it. If there are people around, take out you phone and pretend to make a call. Then take a piece of paper and write your problem down. Describe your problem in the shortest way possible. Then describe it with as many details as possible.
Good! You are on your way to a solution. Now you have to remember to take these steps every time a problem troubles you.
Don't worry. Nobody is watching you read this. Google maybe. Seriously, don't worry if it takes time the first few times. Don't worry if you spend time being angry or being upset before taking Step 1. The important thing is that you did.

In martial arts, you spend most of the times practicing or sparring. Each time, the moves will be repeated again and again. With each try, you will get better. First, it'll be hard and slow going. But the more you practice, the faster you'll become. Faster and faster until muscle memory kicks in. Then you don't even realize you are doing it.

So keep on using the 5 steps. Work on just starting. Then follow through until Step 5. Repeat this until one day you're not even aware. Suddenly, you find yourself describing the problem and seeing the options to solving the problem in front of you.




By then it'll be just be something you do. It'll be second nature. It will be who you are.